Children's Birthday Party Gifts

"There's no way in hell this is what it's all about."

"We are so sorry – normally we don't allow him to have refined sugar."

Pinata angel.

"Are we going with scary clown? Or just plain old spooky?"

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

Swinging on a star.

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

'He made an excellent jelly.'

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

Face painting by numbers.

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

Green Balloon

"I have a feeling he understands more than we think."

Little Princess.

'Maybe the batteries are dead.'

'Never mind about buying that trampoline. I love your new bed!'

Kids with Fish Balloons

A Woman Holding Canapes

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

Children's Party

"Damn! I'm in the wrong fairy tale. This is the three little pig's house, not the three bear's!"

Children playing games

Teddy and friends.

Baxter Higgleton, word balloon artist.

"Mom, can you come get me?"

"Kid gloves, Hernandez. You gotta use kid gloves!"

'Guess how many I ATE.'

Bee costume

"When Mom reads that story, the dragon comes off as a much more sympathetic character."

Teddy bear being taken to hospital.

'...that 12th piece of fudge I ate must have been bad.'

'Gee you're lucky! I don't think the Tooth-Fairy will ever bring me anything...'

Jimmy had a very active imagination.