Child's Education Planning Pillows

'How will we pay for her college.'

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

'It's okay. We'll just push our retirement plan back a bit.'

'The school. My counselor told me to make the most of it...'

Finally I understand why it's called 'Higher Education!'

"Oooh, I know what I want to be when I grow up: Retired!"

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

"Where am I going to college? I thought this was college."

'I wish his guidance counselor spent more time on college plans and less time suggesting names for his band.'

Young Doctor, Young Nurse, Young Undertaker

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

"Papi, can I be president of the United States?"

It's college orientation time. The brain cell is attending an elite academic university, and the hormones and endorphins are going to party schools. The muscle cell earned an athletic scholarship. And it looks like the DNA molecule has already picked a major. The DNA has life planned out. It's chemically active down there. The individual atoms are excited, but also seem a bit sad. Of course! Going off to college is an emotional time for them. Old bonds are breaking and new ones are bein

"Stop applying! You've been accepted to three universities!"

'...and help my parents to pick the right mutual funds in my portfolio for my education...'

'My parents didn't want me getting left behind in the system.'

Private School Interview - 'How much do your parents weigh?'

"My mom got it on. She said you'd get it off."

'Mom, am I store-bought or homemade?'

"Remember to give your Psychologist that apple."

"I try to get a head start on them."

Dispute over pocket money

I would like to start a regualr investment program that will help pay my daughter's college textbooks

Kid to mom: 'How come I ask so many questions?'

"Peter and I spent the summer re-wilding the children."

"Today we practiced counting to five, and the teacher practiced counting to ten."

"You're wasting your time, Dad. I learned in day care a cow jumped over the moon."

"Daddy made six hours of your tuition today."

"Harris here is looking after children's accounts."

Back to School.

"I mistakenly stood in the doorway when kids sunday school released."

"Sorry, kiddo. Your old man has to work so you can go to the best drug trials in the country>"

'Fellas, I swear I'll get you the money! Remember the money was for my kid's education.'

"Gracie, you do not need a cell phone. Little girls like you don't get important phone calls."