Chessboard Judiciary Pillows

"You moved two spaced and then one space to the side? Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that sure sounds illegal."

Cheers For The Hollyhock Middle School Chess Team

'Court's in recess!'

'How about a game of cards?'

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

"I say we move on to dessert."

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

Basketball.

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'

'Radford, go in for Bloom. ... Uh-uh-uh! Finish your vegetables first!'

'The score is tied and we've only got a 20-second timeout, so we've gotta be quick. ... I'm 'X'. Who wants to be 'O'?'

'The 'most improved player of the year award' or the 'you don't suck as much as you did last year award' goes to...'

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

'What are the chances? I mean, all 10 players simultaneously dive for a loose ball and conk heads?'

"Behind the back, between the legs, around my disappointed parents, nothing but net."

'And now for my William Tell shot.'

Moral Bankruptcy Court

Supreme Court Rules Suspension of Parliament Illegal

'I said, I've decided to make myself available for the NBA draft.'

'The bar association barred me from going before the bar...So I came to a bar.'

"She's about to get him on the rebound."

'It just came out. It handles forehands, backhands and overheads all in one motion.'

"Oh, no, it's not a problem at home. We need help with communication on the court."

A powerful tennis serve loosens the strings of a tennis racquet.

Oops! Basketball Game Interrupted

"I can try, but I've never had a marriage overturned on appeal."

Barristers wearing clothes pegs to overcome a bad smell

I think I'd like to make a motion at this time, your honor, but I cut a lot of classes in law school, and I'm not sure if I should make a motion to strike, or compel, or set aside a judgment, or

'And that m'lord concludes the case for the defence. . . '

How to survive the coming crash.

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten! (Published previously September 25, 2006.)

So you'd like to be a lawyer...