Chemistry Critic T-Shirts

'There's not enough chemistry. I'm not hot and bothered. I'm hot, but I can't be bothered.'

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

Thought for today: "All the world's a stage." - Shakespeare. And boy, are there a lot of drama critics.

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

Herman Mankiewicz

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

Reading my Critics

'We look for a new drug, we find a virus - we look for a new virus, we find a drug...'

"I think I may have stumbled on something, Walpole."

Carbon Dating.

Molecules You Ought to be Aware of.

Interdisciplinary studies.

The Style of Elements

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

Micro Psychiatry Clinic. You have a full schedule today, Doctor. The helium atom will be here to work on his fear of heights. The white blood cell with a germ phobia and amoeba with separation anxiety are coming in. The DNA molecule will be here about an identity crisis. And here, in the sports car, comes a new patient, a carbon-14 isotope. Ah, looks like he's going through a half-life crisis!

Scientists are sexy

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

Fusion Lab. Did you tell the boss we need more hydrogen? Yes, I told him we were out of our element.

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

'Sometimes, laughter is the best medicine.'

'What's the big deal about acid rain? Can't we just make alkaline rain to counteract it?'

Genetic modification creating plastic from plant cellulose.

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

Man: 'How cute. He must like the movement.' Cat: 'There are some challenging themes here but little or no dramatic resonance.'

"You'd think he hated music by the way he tortures it."

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point.' Tennyson.'

'In a nutshell, foods are drugged and drugs are eaten like food.'

'Put a tick under 'very toxic'.' (New Orleans Toxic Clean-Up Team).

Scientist admires his structure of a dog