Chelsea Flower Show Pillows

'Chelsea Flower Show.'

Prize vegetables.

Hardy Annuals

'Bearing in mind I'm a man of few words - how much?'

"I see Charlie's really smitten with that pretty thing in the flower shop!"

Poinsettia

'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'

Prize vegetables with rude names.

"There's a house-plant round here somewhere."

'What, not even a kiss first?'

The Flirtateous Period

Gardener of the Year.

"Oh look Harold, a flower shop!"

"I want some flowers that say 'Here, have some friggin' flowers.'"

'It's your WIFE'S name? When you said you were claiming an allowance for supporting CHELSEA I thought......!'

Cheshire Flamenco Dancer... Lipsticked grin clutching flower in her teeth.

Flower Show. How should I present the grand prize? Put the medal to the pedal!

Thanks for the lift to the flower show. I support your volunteer efforts. They're lucky to have someone with your gardening experience. Hardly! Information. The ladies room is to the left, funnel cakes to the right.

Wallpaper over a door.

'My wife and I had a big fight last night.'

Flower Trumpet

N'Golo Kante

'LIKES include floral showers, abstract art, vegan cupcakes?! It's like I don't even know you anymore!'

"30 years ago I'd have thought you were proposing, but now I'm just worried that you've had a heart attack."

'The yellow rose of Texas'

Titan Arum

A clown waters his garden with squirting flower

'And you have utterly destroyed my love of flowers.'

I don't know what to wear. What?!! You never worry about your looks! I'm volunteering at the flower show. The theme is 'Springtime in Paris.' So? The only flamboyant thing I've got is from my flamboyant youth. Go for it, mom. Over the top? You'll need a chaperone.

Callum Hudson-Odoi

Inappropriate Flower Giving

'Chelsea will win the premiership! Is that it?'

Serial Romeo

It's a pity you can't smell it: such a perfume...

I'm with my nana at the flower show. You can't believe how gross everyone is. Listen to this!