Cheerful Gatherer Pillows

Ticker-Ticker Timex Tra-La-La!

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

'Hunting and gathering doesn't sound very interesting, so I have decided to become a consultant.'

Rose Toast

"This might take awhile, Lord."

Midwest Winter Items.

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

Origins of a family tradition.

"When you grow up would you rather be a Hunter or Gatherer?"

"Love the tie, Chad—that is so pimp!"

'I've had so many transplants, I feel like a garden nursery.'

"Oh, its just a fun fur that my husband got me."

Scotland Yard - coal heavers singing in a public house

"As fans we are smart enough to understand the game, but not smart enough to realize how unimportant it really is."

'Here be our new flag, me hearties! A truly Jolly Roger, from now on, we're all about bein' upbeat an' optimistical!!'

'Newton's fourth law - physicists congregate periodically in obscure European cities to have their picture taken, and then they quickly disperse.

"Back from hunting with nothing again?"

"Oh, now I remember you. You live in that big shoe on the corner."

'Not ANOTHER pub boarded up!'

Parp!

"Aren't you suppose to say ho ho ho. . . not meh meh meh?"

"I know what's happened. This is Meet-n-mingle. You should be next door at Hobnobbing."

Ghak was a hunter, Zhoomba was a gatherer and Fnok was a sponger.

'Sure, but I'm the one who has to SKIN it!'

"This is one time of year we count our blessings. . . and not our calories."

'I'm in hunting mostly but I dabble in gathering.'

I'd rather be gathering (cavemen fighting mammoth)

Christmas postie!

"How much of a gratuity does Santa usually get?"

You can stand under my umbrella.

"Hoppy are the peace makers"

'We only have red wine.'

"What do I bring to the company? I'm relentlessly cheerful and able to handle pressure."

Old Country Buffet.