Cheeky Sipper Gifts

'Pint of Binge, please. . .'

"Quick swig first?"

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

We'll have Manhattans...

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

'I don't think my homework is very good. My dog refused to eat it.'

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

Anton's Bar and Grill

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

A very fine vintage

Child praying - asks god to bless his family and the new motorbike he's bought with his father's credit card.

Sticking out tongue

"I do diet...between snacks."

"Wine not?"

Can I get you another coffee?

'Oxygen with that swimsuit ma'am?'

'It's got worse than just the occasional sploosh from a wine box, hasn't it?'

'The arrows were more practical,,,,but I found these have a higher success rate,'

'No I don't do decaf, soy lattes with a shot of vanilla!'

"Okay, we got one cherry lager, with bitters and a pineapple slice, and one honey malt ale with cinnamon and an orange weist. You want these in steins or parfait glasses?"

New for Fall

"Your dump or mine..?"

Thong World.

Footballer scores for the first time and wears T-Shirt reading: 'No longer a virgin.'

'I promised my Dad I'd be home by ten but I didn't say if that was P.M. or A.M..'

'Big Issue!'

Having noticed a hot-looking security woman, Mort quickly penned a note and stuck it in his briefcase.

"It says here that having a glass of wine is good for you."

'Man, the next hangover will kill me for sure... that's why I've decided to be drunk 24 hours a day!'

"The champagne aisle always makes me cry. Just look at all this imprisoned happiness!"

"Which one had the health benefits in it?"

'Look what I found, Dad - Can I keep her?'

I know you're keen to practise the new salsa routine, but I'm getting a bit jealous of the vacuum.