Chaucer Aficionado T-Shirts

'Not a bad term paper, except that I don't think Chaucer ever wrote 'Ye Traveling Salesman's Tale.''

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range.

'I gotta admit it doc. . . My wife was right, a little time on the couch and I already feel better.'

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

'Ask your doctor if getting your fat butt off the couch might be right for you!'

A kangaroo mother with a joey in her main pouch and a juice box in a separate smaller pouch.

'Two, four, six, eight Who do we appreciate ,,,'

Eventual Motion Machine

Peace and Justice Return to the Joint High Commission

Looks like this is the only contest Fluffy has a chance of winning today!

"Well, if I was ambitious, we'd have a nice house and more money, but I'd never be around."

"I'll always love you just the way I am."

"You need the exercise, so I bought you a bigger remote."

Lady having her hair dyed

"How much for the couch without the potato?"

"I know that in these bad times nobody is hiring and workers are still being laid off, but what will be your excuse when the economy recovers?"

John bought himself a new "Unfit" bracelet.

Library. Toss me that copy of "The Canterbury Tales." It's a flying Chaucer!

"Sorry, dear, but vowing NOT to climb Mount Everest this year isn't a valid New Year's resolution."

'Hey, rookie! Go chase that guy!'

Geoffrey Chaucer

'I'm bringing it into the pit! The DVD player conked out in the middle of 'Little Miss Sunshine'.'

'Darling! This isn't a property programme at all! It's the view from our living room window..'

"Somewhere in France Balzac, the parrot, cries Yves Saint Laurent, Yves Saint Laurent, every time the doorbell rings."

Teddy boy's picnic

American Idle

Advanced course at the Wine Appreciation Institute in my house.

'Beautiful day out there, folks. Don't miss it. Complete coverage, coming up next.'

"My physical therapist says this is the worst possible position you can lie in."

Evening Gown

'After two years of therapy, I have concluded that you are a couch potato.'

'I have this--wow! I must have THIS couch--deep seated envy complex...'

"Can you give us a couple hours? We need to pretend we’re trying to find a show we both want to watch."