Chatty Patient T-Shirts

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

'Thanks, but I don't expect you to chew my food for me.'

Remember my mum? I took that photo a week before she died. There's one of me...that was a good haircut.

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

'There's a bench over there why not sit down and rest your weary mouth?'

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

'Harvey does all his own 'get well' cards.'

Radiology, Cardiology and Fertility Clinic.

'Your test results are in - and here's a first, the Lab Techs have asked to meet you.'

"Tell me Mr. Jones. Does it hurt when I do this?"

The New Age Dentist.

"Good news, Mr. Pickett—it's just a slow leak."

'Gee, Doc - couldn't you just use a rubber mallet to check my reflexes?'

'It's a text from Mike - Sorry I'm L8 B THR in a crrrrassssssh!!! ARRRRGGGHHH....;p'

"I just want someone who texts me as often as Joe Biden does, you know?"

'Admit it,you've been bothering the nurses again,haven't you?

"And more intriguingly, your prognosis differs depending on which search engine I use."

Communication

"You just carpe, carpe, carpe."

"Hi! My name is Dr. Jenkins and welcome to 'This is your disease'."

''Is there anybody there?'

"Oh, she just wants attention or needs help."

'No talking' sign at a fishing site.

"Talk? Hell, after a few drinks you can't shut me up."

"Henpecked?! Don't get me started about being hen-pecked buddy!"

'This is a pick 'n' mix ward - you choose your own medicine.'

IV Bags: Main and Afters

'I had a stomach ache, so I took bicarb of soda and went to bed early. Did I do the right thing?'

"I see there's been an improvement in your athlete's foot."

'I keep getting this RINGING in my ears!'