Chatty Coworker Pillows

"Have you heard the news about Susan in logistics?..."

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

Remember my mum? I took that photo a week before she died. There's one of me...that was a good haircut.

'Wow, I sure got a lot of mail today!'

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

"I think I see a miscreant in the carpark. There's no time to call the police I must deal with it myself."

'Jenkins, about these coffee breaks of yours...'

Melvin likes to indulge his inner child.

"Pardon us, Harrison, if the board fails to share your enthusiasm for the foliage up in Darien,"

'It's a text from Mike - Sorry I'm L8 B THR in a crrrrassssssh!!! ARRRRGGGHHH....;p'

'Where's your costume and team spirit? You're not paid to enjoy yourself - you should enjoy your work!'

"Thanks for your offer, but in our company we still have a perfect information and communication system. It's called water cooler talk."

'Thanks for making it guys. Come on in and pull up a chair.' A square hole in an office floor where chairs can be pulled up from

"Let's try one with your hand tucked into your shirt."

'You don't mind distractions as much as me, so I didn't think you'd mind if my kids played in your office today.'

"Oh, she just wants attention or needs help."

"You just carpe, carpe, carpe."

'How did you cope before 24-hour rolling gossip?'

"Every time he elbow bumps me, he hits my funny bone on purpose."

"This one is less distracting."

'All right, who's been sitting on the copier again?'

'It's not your work, Hannon - it's your attitude.'

"They say every team has a member who is suffering from mental health issues. Not this team eh?!"

"Whinge, whinge whinge! Would it kill you to crack a smile? It's no wonder they call you Mona!"

'I play well with others.'

'If his old company was so great, why didn't he just stay there?'

Blah blah blah.

'Believe me, McFarland, I can appreciate a man who marches to the beat of a different Drum, but you don't march, you boogie!'

Pneumatic seat raised through roof.

"Do you play?"

"I enjoy the pearls of folksy wisdom as much as the next guy, but what, exactly, does he do around here?"