Chart Chatter T-Shirts

'I accidentally sent this week's data charts to the 3-D printer.'

Sales chart is buildings in background.

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

"Right, before we look at the covid figures for today, do we need another sheet of paper?"

"Uh-Oh..."

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is, none of us will be alive then.'

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

ACME Balloon Company.

Three businessmen using a pulley system to change a graph

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

"I will now fend off questions from the audience."

Business cartoon showing sales declining so much that they bounce off the floor.

"Thank you, Harris - I get the picture."

"I never dreamed I'd ever enjoy watching my figure this much."

'I don't understand: I lick the plates clean, but Mistress still puts them in the dishwasher afterwards...'

'Perkins, you really know to suck the joy out of a 3rd quarter report.'

'And right here they merged...'

"I'm sorry, JB, we still haven't worked out how we did it."

"Sorry, but there aren't enough life jackets to go around."

Greatest hits, Greatest Misses.

"Oh, I can't complain"

"And here is where we started putting profits before people."

Dragon Graph

"We've met our target on a 25% uplift in sales but that still leaves us 100% bankrupt."

Sales Chart: Boomerangs LTD

Man rotates profit chart so it shows growth not loss.

'This is why we can't have nice things... '

'Your tweets have quite a following.'

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

Despite the economic downturn, sales are as good as ever.

'And you'll be pleased to notice, sir, that we had to eliminate the top of the chart.'