Charisma Critic Pillows

'The jury will please disregard the prosecution's charm and magnetic charisma.'

'Your husband has...charisma? Oh we had one - but the big end kept going.'

Hate Platforms

"Do you have any of those books that understand men?"

"You be the moral grandstander and I'll be the politically incorrect troll."

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

"If he has more than 20 followers on Twitter we call him a 'celebrity'."

"This is a big seller, and we get them cheap...from China."

"About the vaccine, I read online that it was so Bill Gates could inject us with CHIPS!"

'Do you want to reschedule? Normally he has a magnetic personality, but today he seems to have reversed polarity.'

Elon Musk Ditches Twitter Logo

"I don't care what you read on your Facebook feed, the Covid vaccine will not turn you into a zombie flesh eaters."

"Right. Women adore him, men want to be like him, and YOU... well, you're hopeless. So, am I the ONLY one who sees through this guy?"

Otto von Bismarck

"Facebook VP — you'll be in Circle No. 4."

USA 2030

"Can you keep a secret?"

Twitter Prison

An animal has attacked a child. It's very important to the world that you immediately express a bad opinion online.

"who knows, Perkins maybe one day in the far future we'll be bullying each other in addictive artificial environments..."

'I'm worried about Junior. He's so lazy he won't even take his own selfie.'

Facebook's business model

'Dogs have more charisma but cats have more electricity.'

The End of the Internet

'Shall we inform your wife, or let her see it happen on the internet?'

'There's a dangerously fine line between chivalry and being a goody-two-shoes.'

"Wow thanks, Uncle Elon! Best inauguration ever!"

"Trust your instinct son, not the rubbish spewed on Social Media..."