Channel Changer Connoisseur Pillows

"Have you anything to say before I change your channel?"

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

"Oh, goody. More reality-based crap."

Film Lovers.

THE ST. FRANCIS OF ASSISI SHOW.

'I've been watching TV all my life. I was born cable ready.'

Man frozen in portrait pose.

Moliere

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

Bleak House

"I would never do a nude scene, unless the part really called for it."

"Thank you, gentlemen, and may the best networked man win."

Charles Dickens.

"And here - take this Vin Diesel monologue with you!"

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

'What did your grandmother and I do before we had 600 channels? Go ask your 12 aunts and uncles.'

Robert Denarii: 'You talin' to me.'

"We only shop brick and mortar because my husband likes to be disgruntled face-to-face when returning things."

The 'I'm Almost Finished With War And Peace' Bookmark

'Must...find...something...intelligent..!'

The scourge of the 'burbs, cable pirates board another innocent hom in their unceasing search for that one extra channel, the occasional first-run movie, or the highly-prized pay-per-view sports events..

Ennio Morricone RIP

J. Parry Clockmaker

"Hold on there buddy, that's not a KJV Bible." (two men talking, one with a Bible)

"You're beating him senseless, but what you really want is his approval."

Do you know what the interest on you adjustable-rate mortgage is?

"Sky, sir?"