Chakra Explorers Gifts

Third eye

'Oh, crap.'

I figured out how we can pay for the kids' college tuitions. Do tell. I'm going to leave for a year of self-discovery, which I will chronicle in a best-selling memoir. Oh, but

"'Fried Ham' on 3..."

"It's going to be huge! Cheese-flavored vodka!"

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

Repulse Monkey. Difficult position, but one day it may save your life. Get it right!

"I became a mentor because I needed more direction in life."

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

"Should we lick it again?" CX930226

"Great, now we're lost."

"...but this is the stuff of dreams Mr Whitley! Dreams."

"Please....wait...the...meeting...host...will....let you...in....soon."

"Imagine There's No Heaven. It's Easy If You Try..."

"I can Botox it, but I don’t want to freeze up my sixth chakra."

Pastor to couple: 'It is more blessed to forgive than to receive.'

"Do you ever wonder what happens to us when we die?"

'How did you EXPECT me to come back?'

"Who's there?"

"I am the Genie of the Bong! I will grant you... um... I am the Genie of the Bong!"

Yoga Dentist has sign on wall: 'Open Mouth Insert Foot'

Guru Greg's Soul Repair

JWoww becomes fascinated with psychedelic therapy after reading 'How to Change Your Mind' by Michael Pollan.

"My goodness, your back is really knotted up this morning, isn't it?"

Eggs That Were Anagarms In Past Lives -'Unscramble Me'.

Pink Floyd

'You know, I think this is my most boring reincarnation ever!'

"Whoa! Where did you say you got this tobacco from, Jake?"

'Apparently I was wrong about you being Elvis in a past life.. It turns out you were an Elvis impersonator.'

Moses Lost in the Desert....Year 40

"I'm going to India to find myself..."

"Let's work on opening up that fourth chakra."

"To continue with my recorded observations . . ."

The Guru has left this location after discovering the secret to happiness is better cell phone reception.

Well, what did you think they were all praying to?