Ceremony Creators Pillows

"The couple will now exchange vows they wrote themselves, because I guess mine weren't good enough, but, whatever, let's see what you've got."

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

Cow Pinatas

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

'Okay.. what the hell.'

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

Graduates on their phones

'He does.'

'No, but thanks for asking,'

'The correct response, Tanya, is 'I do' not 'yeah, whatever'.'

'Cheryl, you are getting way too wrapped up in the dog.'

'It makes baptisms a lot more fun for everyone.'

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'

'Silly me, I brought the wrong book -- You two just swore an oath of celibacy.'

'You should have seen the one that got away!'

Folk Wedding

'We've postponed the wedding until we come up with something we can do at the ceremony that will become a viral video.'

'They call it the people dance.'

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

'Does my head look big in this?'

'Sorry, I always cry at weddings...'

'I bet you could walk down the aisle blindfolded now,eh,Gloria?'

A baby being christened in a scuba mask.

"I hate weddings. They make me feel a momentary lapse of cynicism."

"It's OK vicar, Nigel's just having one of his panic attacks."

'I'm the groom's broker and I'll be seating you before the ceremony begins. Technical analysts will be sitting on the left, and fundamental analysts will be on the right.'

GLAD-YOU-ATION

The Aisle

'What, They're comfortable.'

'Will you hold it down? This is IMPORTANT!'

Double Wedding

"No bouquet toss for this bride. She's shooting it out of a cannon."

'He'll be really p****d if he doesn't get nominated for an award this year.'