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Soon The Moon Will Have Cellphone Reception Better Than That One Part Of Your Commute

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

Wifi in Hell

'Man, times have changed.'

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

"Your MBA and PHD are impressive but what concerns me is your low number of Facebook friends."

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

'I don't understand. You've wasted the whole interview going on and on about what you know... I think you'd better start telling me who you know.'

"I'm being heavily recruited by several other companies."

"I consider every member of our family to be like family."

I work for a not for profit business. Mind you, two years ago it was a 'for profit' business.

"Phil's an expert networker. One drink and he's on schmooze-control."

Exposed Intimacy Safety Vulnerability Hidden Enmity

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

'I didn't have a glass ceiling I had to break through... I had a golf course I had to conquer.'

'How do I get people to visit my...'

And elevator with 'up', 'down', and 'pitches' buttons

"If he doesn't go nuts first, he'll be the first person to ever write a novel on a cell phone."

Primordial Schmooze

'So, summing up: we 'like' you and you 'like' us.'

"I see you had the foresight to like us on facebook."

'look at my new business cards! The old ones weren't big enough for all my information.'

Media Darling.

"Come in, Wilson. I've traded my phone for some booze. Just another unexpected consequence of the breakup of AT&T."

"He's networking again!"

'Ah, Mr. Collins? We are friends on Facebook, but I can't remember why.'

Cell Phone

"Jessica tells me you have a Twitter following in the six figures."

'Of course, honey, we'll talk - I think I can spare 120 anytime minutes for you today.'

'With this plan, you get Sit, Down, Stay and Rollover minutes.'

I'm looking at photos of potential dates here. Your "screening" process.

"If it weren't for you, we'd have nothing in the cloud."

"I'll recommend your book if you recommend mine."

'Name tag's up here, Ma'am - I'm from the Cattlemen's Delegation.

"Yes, I see where you left your phone."