Celebrity Satire Admirer Gifts

Gregg Allman

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

UK border controls relaxed.

Lesser known greek gods,

How about going easy on the carbs

'Marsha, did you file the Peterson account on the cumulus, stratus, cirrus, or nimbus cloud?'

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

Denmark scrapped anti-blasphemy law!

Czarcasm

'Hi - I'm your company perk !'

Reese Witherspoon

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

'Ah Mr Bond, I haven't been expecting you...'

"Doctor - at home I get this nagging pain... what do you recommend?"

Michael Jackson - Mission fulfilled.

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

"I've heard great things about your church. Thought I would visit and say keep up the good work."

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

'It's not much of a soap opera with just that Adam guy.'

"A haand gel...!?"

'It's one of our new technology rings, it allows you to download karats.'

Hot cross buns

Bureaucracy gone mad!

David Niven caricature

"And yet methinks, Martha, that 'Ibsen with Rhythm' seems somehow to miss the point of Ibsen."

"Well, that was the weirdest tribute band I've ever seen."

'Probably giving evidence at some sort of industrial tribunal....heh!'

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

'And remember team, if you can't join 'em, lick 'em!'

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

"The only reason I'm firing you for your suggestion is because you signed yours."

'During the heart-transplant, since it was your birthday, I went ahead and added two more inches, no charge.'