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'Is that about the TV show or Dave Lee Travis?'

'People who say professional athletes are nothing but arrogant, self-absorbed crybabies are forgetting one thing: we're OVERPAID, arrogant, self-absorbed crybabies.'

Michael Jackson dangles Justice over balcony.

Treasury of Spain denounces Shakira

"It's about the Bill Cosby sex scandal!"

Benedict Cumberbatch

Lesser known greek gods,

'Good news. We're not Daft Punk.'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

Reese Witherspoon

How a Bill Becomes a Law, 2023

Elvis Presley

Brad Pitt

New Flavors at Where's the Scoop Ice Cream

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

'The only cuts we can all agree with are their cutting remarks!'

US election postal vote controversy

Donald Trump Tells a Joke...

"This is no time for fightin', princess, there's a war on!"

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"Ok, ok, climate change is not a hoax!"

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

'David when we said we would like you to be a role model for us. . .'

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"Hey, Bob. Things haven't been quite the same since Richard Attenborough arrived here, have they?"

Best Seller in Washington D.C.: Politics for dummies

Elton John

Meet Santa's entourage

"Our next story should interest all our viewers...it's a real can of worms."

"What are you doing?"

All Star Team.

Dogs Touring Hollywood

"When did you first notice you were larger than life?"

Sylvester Stallone

Elton John