Celebrity Culture Advisor Prints

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'The fine art of being famous for being famous...The industry standard is to be the most obnoxious one on a reality show...'

Benedict Cumberbatch

"I think he was a celebrity."

The americanisation of vulture.

"This may surprise some of your viewers, but I didn't actually want to go into the box."

Little Red Riding Carpet

You know how Kanye West and Kim Kardashian are known as "Kimye," and Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are known as "Branjelina"? I think we should combine "Lance" and "Gloria" into either "Lania" or "Glance." What do you think? I think I won't be needing a menu now, as I'll be busy gagging.

'Has Oprah ever been married?'

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

George Clooney Machine

Maps to the homes of guys with friends who know some of the limo drivers of the personal trainers of the stars.

Nick Cave

"My spokesperson won't speak to me."

'I know I don't look like a matinee idol of yesteryear anymore, but neither do they!'

Ringo Starr

Snow White and her Seven people.

Justin Timberlake

Wayne and Kerry created a joint name like their idols Brangelina and Tomkat.

Amanda Seyfried

"I was at a party with SO many famous people, I was the only one there I'd never heard of..!"

Bette Midler

Band Aid-style rock stars wear T-shirts that read : 'Feed my ego'.

"A P.R. Intern Named Salome with the Head Shot of John the Client."

Geri Halliwell.

"I don't know what that is, either - it could be the Olsen twins."

'He may be the Messiah, but he's no Springsteen.'

"Two Cagneys and a side of Garbo to go. Hold the Bogart."

Chihuahua's nightmare: 'There's a sneering voice talking to me: 'You'll get stuffed between a blonde celebrity's breasts till you can't breathe anymore!' Then I wake up bathed in sweat...'

Jennifer Lawrence

W.C. Fields

"Well, now we know what Letterman's doing, what are we doing?"

TV-Mirror.

'I'm Anna Nicole Smith. But not THE Anna Nicole Smith!'

"I didn't mean anything by it. I don't know why I said it. I just said it, that's all. Twiggy."