Celebrating A New Relationship Mugs

'Your rhino, or mine?'

"Estella, you have the two most beautiful eyes in the world."

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

Albert & Myra - The End Story

Couples' therapy

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'

Happy Valentine's Day.

"...And do you promise if you ever should divorce that you'll remain friends?"

Emotional Bling

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

(First signs) (A half loaf of bread, ... a jug and a half of wine, and thou beside me.)

'Silly me, I brought the wrong book -- You two just swore an oath of celibacy.'

The Plinth Wedding Planner Co.

"Well, who's stupid idea was it to honeymoon on Moonlight bay?!"

"I'll agree to a pre-nup if you'll agree to a non-compete clause."

"Don't you think we should wait to see the effects of the new tax code?"

Novelist, writing her own vows... runs into writer's block.

"Will the role of wife call for any nudity?"

"Hold on—I'm getting information as to why these two should not be wed."

50,000 BC: The First Engagement Ring.

'I do so much better with women when I quit trying to understand them and just repeat what they say to each other.'

'I hear they wrote their own vows.'

Happy Valentine's Day

"Do you, Amanda and John, promise to watch yourselves, mind your Ps and Qs, and generally step on eggshells in this marriage, in order to somehow keep it up and running for as long as possible?"

'Good night darling...sweet nightmares.'

Romance

"Do you, Ashley, take Nesbitt and his genome to be your husband?"

Exit/Missed it/Next Time Listen To Your Wife!

'And now, with the authority invested in me, I pronounce you man and wife. Formerly single.'

"He's everything I want in a man."

"Remember when we used to wonder whether to kiss on the first date?"

Christmas Socks

'Wait a minute - This is getting too close for comfort.'