Cautious Lab Companions T-Shirts

A man in a padded suit stands behind a scientist

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

'If he grabs the broccoli, we turn on the Raffi tunes. If he heads towards the Playstation, he hit him with the air horn at 100db.'

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

'Rover isn't any good at catching frisbees. You've heard of stone hands?...he's got a stone mouth.'

Armstrong? Why did UPS just deliver a microscope, a robotic arm, a huge incubator, a nucleus extractor and a dozen lab rats? Well, it's certainly not so I can replace you with an army of clones programmed to work for free. Well

"This never happened."

'A problem with the Phase II trials. Everyone - all the people - was given the placebo, and no one got the drug.'

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point.' Tennyson.'

'How's the gene-splicing going? Cloned any new hepatitis antibodies?'

'Simply put.'

"I'm going to get you fired."

'Let's agree to dispense with the rules of nomenclature and call it compound X.'

'How about a toast to my breakthrough?!'

"He wants to study bacteria to relate to the counter culture."

"One day mommy's slime molds will all be yours!"

"My first night in the lab and I was clearly the smallest brain in the place."

Shaggy dog/Shaggy Owner.

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

Chasebook

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point'. Tennyson.'

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

'Well, well - this should create a nice little wave of panic and hysteria.'

"If we crunch the numbers, it should have zero calories."

"I'd call that 'A victory for science.'

Where did you learn alchemy? Elementary school.

Bio, Inc. Should we continue to invest in this promising new cloning technique? Yeah, let's double down on it.

'I'm growing mini human brains from stem cells.'

"The trouble is, professor, you see the Erlenmeyer flask half empty and I see it half full."

"That's just great. I discover the cure for the common cold and all you can do is criticize."