Catastrophe Predictor Gifts

Scandals Foretold

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

"We're at the top of the food chain and rulers of all we survey. What could possibly go wrong?"

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated

'You'll find there's no middle ground with Kirk Knoland.'

The End Is Nigh. . . Told You

Beware of the 4th quarter.

'Fenwick is here with a dire warning about the next bubble to burst.'

Cosa Nostradamus: "Listen, you mook. I predict if you don't pay the vig to the Don by tonight you'll be at the bottom of the Hudson by morning."

Venice Floods

The End of the World is Nigh - man with placard

Horsemen of the Apocalypse: Death, Pestilence, (Drugs) War, Famine.

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

"Excuse me, do you have a moment to talk about that?"

doom.com

'Well, I'll be darned! It looks like just a lot of the same old stuff from here on out for you.'

How to survive the coming crash.

'No, Brian, an asteroid impact would never take us by surprise like it did the dinosaurs because we're highly intelligent and they were very stupid and dull-witted.'

Climate Change Contingency House

'Took longer than I thought it would.'

A Dow Jones Industrial Average Correction Is Near

Doom Gloom.

Chaos Theory: Only 6 More Days Until All Hell Breaks Loose!

"I've half a mind to protest."

'The End is Near' and 'There's No End In Sight.'

Mr. Science Times

Cluster Catastrophe

'I went in to get my mortgage renewed. I said: 'Make it for eight months and four days!'. . . Am I only the one who thinks the world ends in December?'

'Tell me more about your premonition of impending dom, Mr Syms...'

Doomsdayers recycle pamphlets in case they are wrong.

"Can you stop, now, Lord...for a while?"

"Ambitions... to be proved wrong."

Two doomsayers, one with a sign saying 'The end is near due to global warming' and the other 'The end is near due to nuclear winter'.

'Landsbanki collapses in October 2008 and affects thousands of investors,' - 'The 'Eyjafjallajokull' volcano erupts in April 2010 causing massive disruption to international airspace,' - 'The question you have to ask is, 'Did sacking Kerry Katona,,,'

"I'd say, psychotic-obsessive -- but I happen to know he's a top-level economist."