Casual Complaining Pillows

"I finally have an ailment that isn't so bad that I'm worried, but bad enough for me to complain about constantly"

Flyfishing for dummies.

"Geez, from way up here it almost looks like there’s hope for humanity."

'Almost everything I have hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

'Anorak anoraks'.

"Whine and cheezed party."

'If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room.'

"It's a great story, funny and entertaining - and better still it's not won a single prize for literature."

Sports Fan - Whoever's Winning

"What a day. I almost lost my smug look of detached superiority."

'... Further to our telephone conversation of the 3rd, my fax of the 11th, my letters of the 16th, 23rd and 28th, my emails of....'

'Typical, I hadn't finished complaining about the rain...'

Meeting at the Grumpy Old Men's Pub.

"I just realized that unless I'm riding for some cause, I must look like an idiot."

'I don't like to complain, Evelyn, but aren't these family reunions getting out of hand?'

"In what way do you feel you have been unfairly treated?"

'This decaf's lousy.'

"Frankly, I can't really understand why my husband would be referred to as a "Domestic Cat": he does nothing around the house..."

"Is it always so cloudy?"

Bob's whine cellar.

'There's supposed to be 56 million bubbles in a bottle of Champagne -- I only counted 54, 325,775.'

Medical Bracelet

"True, the fly is not in my soup. But it took one taste of my soup and dropped dead."

"To be perfectly honest, Tarquin, I get fed up listening to your stories about 'the good old days'."

'I simply don't know what I'd do with mother, if it wasn't for the squatters!'

'What the hell good are new federal regulations if they don't have teeth?'

"Frankly, I could move a lot faster, but the truth is that I lack motivation..."

'To be honest, you're the only one who sometimes bothers to hear my complaints.'

'Aren't you done yet? This is taking forever! I should have went somewhere else!...'

"One more remark like that, lady, and you'll never get to see this show."

"I heard you are charging a monthly fee for using your debit card, and I'm here to complain!"

"A movie? I would rather watch this!"