Casting Connoisseurs Mugs

"Once upon a time, seven dwarves was a tall order but now the snow white virgin is the real problem

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

'Who's the new guy?'

Of pitting his own wits against their natural cunning

Bee to bee: 'We used buzzwords before they were trendy.'

'If your name's not on the Liszt, you're not coming in.'

The Wagnerites- An Evening at the Opera

"I was really impressed by the way you sent back the wine, though it did come in second to the waiter's uppercut."

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

"I would never do a nude scene, unless the part really called for it."

'The website made a mistake. Not 'erotic' - 'neurotic'.'

"He's a mental-health critic."

"I'm afraid you will have to sign a non-disclosure agreement."

'I hope you are not playing God again . . .'

"I don't feel we've known each other long enough to sit in a booth."

"Are you talking to me?"

'Ralph, how much do you want for that lure? Just name it.'

"L'adoration des comiques."

'Don't look now, but Cain and Abel messed up your 'Natural Selection' program.'

Jewish Deep Thinker

"Are you really sure we're supposed to give points for sound?"

Half his pleasure lies in manipulating his beloved tackle

'Would you like you water from the Indian or the Chinese side of the Himalayas?'

"I hate to be that guy, but, technically, Frankenstein is the name of my creator, and I'm Frankenstein's monster."

Man reading while being surrounded by TV's

"The only calls not dropped are to your tech support."

The Sequels

After Hours At Lincoln Center

"His publicist said he died peacefully. And now, a word from our sponsor, a publicist looking for a new client."

'But if you were going to watch the idiot box, wouldn't you rather watch it in HD?'

'You call that a comedy routine? Seriously, it was laughable!'

Auditioner auditions.

The Who's Not Who Guide.