Casino Night Planner T-Shirts

'Okay, so I lost $1,000 at the penny slots. It's not like I lost it at a $5 machine.'

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

"I loved the bit where you hid under the seat."

'You deserve some unabashed fun once in a while.'

Casino. Keno. $$$. Win. Cashier. He sure wins a lot! He's "Keno Savvy."

"As your CPA, I would recommend you count the number of eggs before you hide them."

"If they give you any trouble, find a good babysitter and go out for the evening."

'Wh...What's that behind the...EEEIII!!

'Sunglasses? Silly hats? Face cards?'

'I detect you scanning my cards!'

"Oh, she just wants attention or needs help."

'I know that you've come away with a small fortune. But you went in with a big one!'

"This better be important."

Fun in bedroom - Scrabble.

'Look - forget I asked if you were free any evenings...'

'This dinner had everything necessary to make it perfect...Great food, candlelight, violinist... you clutching your chest after seeing the check.'

Video Rental. "Wall Street," "Sunset Boulevard," Cannery Row" --- This is not what I meant when I said I was in the mood for a road movie.

"I've seen every goddam film ever made...twice! What the hell am I supposed to do now??"

Game Hen on a Downward Spiral: 'What the hell. I ain't no chicken! I'm bettin' it all!'

Can't you put away your cell phone? Just seeing if Nick's at the prom already. U there yet? Almost!

The whole club stands behind the coach...

'And that's the quickest way out of the car park after the game.'

The Waiting Game

'He's using a cheat sheet, ump! Can he do that?'

'I came for the $1.99 seafood buffet--I'm staying for the restrooms.'

"See you in the morning."

'Like it or not, I'm having a guys night out. I'll be at the sand bar!'

2010 Calendar.

"It's more than one kid. You better cut the watermelon into pieces."

The Passover Police

'Yes, I know we're hyenas - but sometimes I just don't feel like laughing, Kate.'

'Because I know you Henry!! You'll go charging off with the boys, trumpeting at anything that moves and forget to take the garbage out!!'

'Wait! Stick him back in the freezer. Coach changed his mind. He wants us to warm up a lefty.'

'I've told you - This family is not moving on to higher video technology until we've mastered pong!'

"Gracie, we've sitting here all day planning our first week of summer fun."