Casino Dealer Pillows

Hit me.

'Nothing really happened in Vegas, but my money stayed there.'

'I don't like to take chances.'

"Say, isn't that our financial planner dealing blackjack over there?"

'Must you shuffle when you walk?'

'This town was built from the losses of thousands of suckers, Billy. Fortunately for us, we know what we're doing.'

What really happens inside an automatic shuffler.

'I can't see a damn thing -- can you tell me what I've got?'

"Would you please come with us, Sir?!"

'Say, isn't that our financial planner dealing blackjack over there?'

'C'mon square root of 49!'

'I thought she'd never leave.'

'You had to go for a walk--now we've lost our table.'

Christmas Gambles

Game Hen on a Downward Spiral: 'What the hell. I ain't no chicken! I'm bettin' it all!'

'This is a banking style investment casino.'

'You know at a glance that you've got $12,675 in chips in front of you, but you're not sure if you've got five bucks in your wallet?'

'My wife encourages this. She thinks I'm playing the Russian version.'

The Casino-Dealer

Slug roulette.

'But I should win, I had four aces first.'

"I bet you $10 the next insect we catch is caught in Sector 5..."

'Should I take a hit? I've got 21, but I'd really like to finish the roof.'

Dog in casino.

One Armed Bandit

'Could someone just tell me if I win anything?'

'Are you sure you want to do this?'

'Insurance?'

"I'll stay."

Blackjack: free lemonade!

"Snake eyes again!"

Speed gambling

'It's time for my break. Lenny will take good care of you. Good luck!'

'In the 20 minutes it took for the pit boss to come back with a comp for the $10 buffet, I lost another $500.'

December 26 - Vegas, office (post) Christmas party.