Carpool Comedian Mugs

You're turning onto Jackson? Miller is waaaay faster! Watch the kid on the bike! Backseat GPS.

Clown Car Lane: 10 or More

'Nope. He doesn't qualify you for the carpool lane.'

"This car sharing scheme is great, I'II try to get it back to you in a month or so."

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

I drive, therefore I am.

Lady to angler whose line is snagged: 'You would manage to get your line caught in the one tree in this entire massive lake.'

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

"Good news, sir – your carry-on has been upgraded to business class."

"We live in the desert. What did you think I meant when I said it'd be a nice day to go boating?"

"Your new car won't start? Oh, well, umm…that's just the car's Collision Avoidance System kicking in. It doesn't want you to hit anything today."

Zoology. Cheetahs can reach speeds up to sixty miles an hour! Amazing, and yet they never win!

"You car pool guys will be going down together for x-rays."

Many clowns in rowboat

Pine tree driving a truck with a human-shaped air freshener hanging off the mirror

'They've been carpooling together for 30 years.'

'Another day, another dollar.'

'I swear this self driving car is falsifying it's records to avoid an insurance rate hike."

'Do you remember what make of car it was, sir? -- We'll have to order parts.'

My car idles well! It learned a lot from you!

I'm late. Nothing you can say will convince me to drive you to school. O.K. Slam!

Traffic sign: Right lane ends - Merge into oncoming traffic.

'Yes, this is romantic, but that's not why I chose this. Gas prices are up, and i can't afford dinner, movie and gas for my car.'

'Amazing! 140 decibels as he hits the surface! That puts him easily into first!'

Man crashes his car before leaving the driveway because he forgot his glasses.

'I don't need a computer to tell me I failed to fasten my seat belt or release the emergency brake.'

'They all work from home now, but still get together for carpool reunions.'

'Look dad! - Mercedes bends!'

'Why do they call it the school RUN Mummy?'

I heard Sarah called you. Yeah. She's hot. Shh! Click. Click. Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap. Hey! No texting in the car! It distracts the driver!

Clown car lane: 10 or more.

Car pool lane.

'Sorry, Mary. We know you won the lottery and quit, but we still need you to drive with us we so can use the car pool lane.'

'Lots of people have longer commutes than you.'