Carefree Coworker Pillows

'Pemberly, I'd like to tweak you ignorance.'

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

I took a vacation to forget everything and I forgot my luggage.

Armstrong? Why did UPS just deliver a microscope, a robotic arm, a huge incubator, a nucleus extractor and a dozen lab rats? Well, it's certainly not so I can replace you with an army of clones programmed to work for free. Well

"We should have taken the cubicles."

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

Free Range Employees.

To determine which department would be awarded the Billings contract, employees agreed to play a best-of-five dodgeball tournament.

'You have failed on all counts...'

'Just look at him- a fool and his money are soon partying!'

"Should be back soon. He's just out catching a few x-rays."

'Since we've remodeled, you are no longer here.'

Business Vacation.

Jack-in-the-Box Enterprises.

'Where's your costume and team spirit? You're not paid to enjoy yourself - you should enjoy your work!'

Wearing bras in 2020.

Job hoppers.

Desk boxes: 'In', 'Out', and 'What ever'.

'Your heart's not in the job - admit you're only doing it for the money!'

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

'I warned you about eating at your desk. The Board of Health impounded your keyboard.'

"John, does this mean you've given up looking for work?"

"Perhaps it was wrong to say 'May our company become a home to you'..."

Weathervanes.

"They got rid of 'work from home,' so I pushed for 'blanket forts from office.'"

"Every time he elbow bumps me, he hits my funny bone on purpose."

'It may be goofing off to you, but to me it's biding my time.'

'All right, who's been sitting on the copier again?'

"They say every team has a member who is suffering from mental health issues. Not this team eh?!"

"This is the software for my head."

Lunch.

Lethargics Anonymous - In, Out and Pending Trays.

'I play well with others.'

One of the positives of having to 'Shelter in Place'...

"'Work' is a magic word around here."