Career Reassignment T-Shirts

"We've decided not to discharge you. You've been assigned to work in an army surplus store."

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

Where your mind & battle are los

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

Butterfly Woman

'Let's not go by the book.'

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

In basket-case.

'How fast can you hype?'

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

"It's clear to me that you want to go far with this company."

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

'The lads at the office still talk about the day you told the boss what to do with his job...'

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

Doug had trouble getting home at a decent hour.

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

"He's having a hard time finding work."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

Pipe Dream.