Career Quitter Pillows

"I want to quit, spend more time with my family, finish grade 3....."

'It's a nicotine patch...I've been smoking too much.'

"Its my letter of resignation. I also turned it into a memoir."

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

'This should be good. He just won the lottery!'

Trapeze artist leaves sign saying 'I quit'!

"I just hit the lottery for a million bucks, so today I'm going to punch that timeclock for the last time."

'After all these years of purposely losing to the boss, I beat the pulp out of him and turned in my resignation.'

"Can we get some more nicotine patches, pal?"

"My chronic condition has been pestering me every single day for the past six months. I'm a lifelong quitter so its persistence is troubling me."

'Its going to be difficult to replace you. Especially on the salary we were paying.'

The trouble with trying to quit smoking.

The Patch.

"I want out!"

'I'll only have one pack of nicotene patches this week. My mate's supposed to be getting me some cheaper ones from abroad.'

'After you stop smoking you're supposed to eat more, not drink more.'

'To show I'm serious about giving up smoking for new year, I'm going to sign this pledge.'

"Phil suddenly decided to give up everything that was bad for him-no more smoking, drinking, or junk food-and he feels absolutely terrific!"

'Sorry, you can't smoke in the control group.'

'Are you still frustrated with the computer, dear?'

'Do the patches help?'

Smoker's Lungs.

I'm no longer on Twitter. I ran out of interesting things to say. Now I'm on Quitter.

"This year, I resolve to give up smoking."

'Sorry, Mary. We know you won the lottery and quit, but we still need you to drive with us we so can use the car pool lane.'

Captain Hook tries the cigarette patch.

'I'm down to five a day with this new brand!'

"Mr. Brown, my ship came in. I've decided to cruise right on out of here!"

Man emphasizing that he has quit (colour)

'He started smoking again because he misplaced the remote control!'

'So, how's the anger management course going, then?'

'Thank you for welcoming us into your...'

Smoking Area

'I need a cigarette! I'm having a nicotine fit!'

The Quitbit