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Businesswoman Empowerment

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

"I want to make it before I hit thirty."

Caged Businessman

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

"You haven't been laid off because you're the designated scapegoat."

"That's a big fat lie!"

'...and, if your idea is so imaginative, innovative and original, why aren't our competitors doing it?'

'Of course you're overworked and underpaid! Didn't you read the fine print in your employee's contract?'

'Dang! My applications as a mailman, a football player and a dancing teacher got rejected. I guess I've got to go on hunting that stupid white whale...'

The Remote Olympics

Ladder of Success.

"All our staff are equal, but the ones with qualifications are more equal than others."

"Our sales have slumped so much, we now have a couch for them."

Paper being carefully folded until it resembles a scrunched up paper ball.

"What can I DO? I'm Lightning Larry, for God's Sake!"

'I used to chase cars. Now I chase yield.'

"Unfortunately, Whitcomb, I am suffering from compassion fatigue."

Career counselor: 'If you want a great job, that won't be exported, get into politics.'

Believe or not but before he became a famous artist he was a shoe salesman.

"Me, I've quit racing. I was very good at it, but I just couldn't hack the early training sessions..."

'That's what I said,dear-your dinner's in the chippie..'

"Sorry, Dad."

"The great resignation is being fueled by the desire to brag about quitting one's job on LinkedIn."

'Let's not look at it as failure. lets look at it as a chance to do better.'

'...no you can't phone a friend!'

The Glass Floor

The Basic Blueprint for 99% of Today's Conversations (or So it Seems)

"The seventh green is gonna be a bitch!"

"Well, I wouldn't exactly say we're pursuing bankruptcy. It's more like bankruptcy is pursuing us."

"The only time I let my staff show fear is when they're trying to save their jobs."

'My problem is that I'm number one in my field and I have no place to go but down.'