Card Sender Humorist Mugs

"Writing Christmas cards shouldn't be this complicated dear!"

I can't smile without you...

Daffodil bulbs

"My scoop-back tank comes in Mango, Morning Glory, and Scallion. Don's Maori surfers are available in Iris, Mustard, and Prawn."

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

"In mitigation, Sunny Chemicals would like to point out that prior to contracting his skin allergy, Mr Crumb was already ugly."

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

"Listen, the first pterodactyl of spring."

'... And I'd like to thank my agent and everyone who voted for me... '

Surreal Ale Pub.

Receiving the early-morning T-mail.

'Vacuums!'

'Be careful opening this...it's marked dangerous goods.'

Just Survived My 3rd COVID Scare Dance.

'Still no Christmas card from the Pope? - We did send HIM once, didn't we?'

Bunny express,

Post early for Christmas 2010.

'Any idea where my night vision visor is?'

'He's our Spam expert!'

"Dude, don't say it..."

Spam Folders

'Gentlemen, I have evidence that one of us is a spy.'

"I've forgotten your face but I remember your mask."

'DO me a favor. Don't keep saying 'Hi. How's it going?' whenever you swim past me.'

Christmas postie!

"Now that the kids and grandkids are grown I can get back to more erotic embroidery."

"He's been carrying out cyber attacks."

Daybreak at bulb camp

Light Switch

'It was the menu in this pub that drove me to drink...'

When I went in they were discussing Tina Turner.

Boy stays on grandpa's 'check list.'