Carbonation Curious T-Shirts

New In! Flat Coke.

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

The Alpha Seltzer

"COUGH! COUGH! Years of data mining have left me with data lung. Don't be like your old man - go into modeling or visualization!"

Real data visualization specialists are 100% committed to their profession.

Ticket - At the Theatre in the Hay Market - The Authors Benefit Pasquin.

"And up ahead is a place called, 'portage'."

"Some good predictive analytics software would have really helped us avoid this mess..."

"I'll need all the information you can find on why I need so much information."

"Do you want a drink or do you need a drink ? We're very busy...."

'Do you feel as foolish as I do, having a conference with Billy's teaching machine?'

'This low-alcohol beer doesn't taste bad with a scotch in it.'

"According to our eye tracking studies,either nobody is looking at the content on our site, or all the participants have lazy eye."

"Yo! You check the pH lately? I have sensitive eyes, ya know."

"He's watching too much educational TV."

"Here, son, don't forget your glass of fizzy."

"This may be the beer, Zoloft, Rogaine, Cialis and Avapro talking ... but I feel weird."

'Oh no! I've had tons wiped off my footprint.'

"The new tax software is a real eye opener. Every misguided, impulsive purchase I made for the business last year really pops and sizzles in a visual data format!"

A sign at a bar above some stools reads "Express Stools (3 drinks or less)".

"Any apologies for absence?"

Gin-etic Engineering

Teacher with wing-mirror on blackboard.

'Looks like the work of the infamous international frequent flyer burglar - Better dust for carbon finger prints!'

An awkward moment during the coronation...

"We may be up a creek but at least we've got a paddle!"

"We tried crowdsourcing the data, but the crowd turned into an angry mob and threw bogus data at us."

"Glad you like the beer. I put a little Prozac in it."

"God, if you can help me find a seat by my friends, I'll listen to my teachers, do my homework and clean my room..."

'...well Martha's just converting some alcohol to acetaldehyde and then to acetate, and then to CO2 and water but I can get her to call you later...'

"Face it, Gail. We've drifted apart."

"Do you think terrorists could ever poison the vodka supply?"

'You know when people have been good or bad - you'd be perfect for our data mining team!'

'Well somebody should have checked!'