Car Owner Chuckler T-Shirts

"Now, son, hitting a car is all about timing. You'll want to release about here..."

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

I break for toilet paper

'Beware of SUV.'

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

'You need orthopedic brake shoes.'

'... Yes, that's right. It has had one careful owner and three not so careful owners.'

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

"Added a new catalytic converter, upped the horse power, and installed a new intake system... but we still can't get rid of the clown."

'Power steering.'

Australian Sat Nav - 'Straight on mate'.

Driving a Lemon.

'I hope you don't mind carpooling.'

"That's where I do 'my business'."

'Why can't you ride under the dash like other airbags?'

". . . Hey, hold that thought, I gotta use the windshield. . ."

Driver with a rear view mirror attached to his forehead.

Road rage in the car-to-car technology era.

Re-explore familiar surroundings. You may come across some fresh, new surprises!

'This model runs on antibiotics.'

'I see the problem.' Car grill looks like teeth.

The Magician world's version of Fluffy dice.

"Yes, it does come with a tech package. It's called a battery."

'It's completely gutless. With all the money you save on speeding tickets it'll practically pay for itself.'

Other decals on cars.

"It will cost $1,200 to fix that dent...or I could just make an identical dent on the other side for $19.99."

"Let me call you back. They're toeing my car."

"I brake for all Police Cars."

Fly driving a car with little humans on the windscreen.

Out of Bumper Stickers.