Car Banter Buff T-Shirts

I still don't see how these 'hand free' laws make you any safer...

Men's fragrances...

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

'I found what was making those funny noises.'

'...and, of course you get a company car.'

"I'm glad I don't have to put gas in it. the downside is that it takes a lot of time to put 3,000 AA batteries in it."

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

'Beware of SUV.'

"It takes me only one drink to get drunk. Its either the seventh or eighth."

22. Being tireless is good trait to have in most jobs, but not when you're working on a pit crew.

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

"Are you sure? It doesn't look like a diet pill!"

A medical office filing cabinet has drawer labels that read, 'X-Rays,' 'Lab Work,' and 'Exam Room Banter'

Fast Lane. cars Like yours.

"This new car is so smart, it wrote its own AUTObiography."

Gas Pedal Sticking?

Auto Assembly. Ernie, I think they fired you because you were assigned to the assembly line but ere often at the high-speed test facility. I'm ambitious. I wanted to be on the fast track. Why did you remove brakes from cars? An article I read said that to achieve success you should "pull out all the stops." And I unnecessarily drove cars around the plant to show the bosses that I'm willing to "go the extra mile." But why did you refuse to deliver components to the assembly line? The arti

Democracy for Hire

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

'Told you so.'

'Are you sure we're on the right track?'

Clown shows his car to a clown mechanic, saying: 'She's running just great, could you take a look at her?'

The driverless car

'Any chance of a bit of....er...Blue on Blue?'

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

"Your new car won't start? Oh, well, umm…that's just the car's Collision Avoidance System kicking in. It doesn't want you to hit anything today."

A production line adds condiments to cars

Policeman to driver; 'You gotta be kidding. Your name is actually Anna Nicole Smith?'

Menu. How much is that stuff? Read the hash tag.

"A kiss? But I just brushed my teeth."

'Zero to sixty in three days.'

Used Cars. Spot. It seats six comfortably -- Of course, only four of them can stick their heads out the window.

'It is fuel efficient, but my ego feels crunched.'