Cannoli Fanatic T-Shirts

"If the cops stop us, we're going to look pretty silly carrying a giant cannoli around the city this time of night."

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

'You wanted to be a wine maker in the worst way, Paul - and you've succeeded.'

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

'I'm an atheist!'

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

The discoverer of fire meets the discoverer of marijuana

'I started as an office boy and growled my way to the top.'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"Not while they're making artisanal bread."

"It all comes down to the aging and fermentation process."

Remote control car breakdown.

'There are shortcuts to making home brew, but taking a swig of malt extract and letting it ferment in your mouth isn't one of them.'

José Saramago

Wine connoisseur in search of new vintage.(Wine)

Portrait of Shakespeare smoking.

Nobody warned Marge that a side effect of a hip replacement is feeling more hippy.

'Grandma makes everything from scratch! Why don't you ever buy any scratch?'

Diet Sugar House.

"...now she's up tp a jumper a week."

"Crayons again?"

"Brian's in the kitchen doing some blind baking."

'But our secret ingredient is large quantities of Hilberg beer.'

"I don't prescribe opioids, but feel free to grab a CBD-laced lollipop on your way out."

'These new ideas are silly, Father, the boiled tobacco tasted awful and you've spent an age trying to light that potato.'

Hot weather brings misery to millions.

The Farmer's Return.

"It's my white whale."

Mashed potatoes...

'Byt the way, what have you been eating? Because your crap tastes like crap!'

Please Do Not Pounce on Art