Canine Nutrition Pillows

'I'm putting Babs on a diet. She's more paunch than pooch.'

"Lemme guess. Kibble."

"Is this any way to treat 'Man's best friend'?"

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

'Who had the ocean whitefish and tua paté?'

'One final question.. what's your policy on table scraps?'

"Odd, since neither of us overfeeds her by even the smallest amount."

'My owner is feeding me way too much organic food.'

"That's it - your diet starts tomorrow"

"Who's got excellent kidney function, according to this most recent round of tests? You do! Yes, you do!"

'You put him on a diet, so he put you on a diet.'

'You're leaving if I'm going to inject him?...

"MOUSE FLAVORED CAT FOOD"

Fido and Fifi

'This one is very effective. It sounds just like a can opener.'

Vet to angry-looking dog: 'You ate some crabgrass, eh? Were you self-medicating again?'

"How did you cure your dog of begging for food?"

"See, I told you he didn't want to go out."

-'God that looks disgusting.' -'You're telling me.'

'I've been fixed even though there wasn't anything wrong with me.'

'Sorry, chubs, but those little circles you do before lying down don't cut it as exercise.'

"For what you are about to receive..."

'Those tid-bits you left for Ming Toy were delicious, Mrs. Caldwell!'

'You're lucky you can't read.'

'I don't think that brand of cat food is very healthy.'

'Hunger is a terrible thing, especially around dinner time!'

"Don't be fooled, it looks easy but I've yet to meet a dog who's mastered it."

The four basic food groups: Dry, Moist, Biscuit, Bone.

'What! No garnish or side salad?'

'I don't care if top breeders do recommend it - I am not going to eat dog food!'

"He won't wait for me to open the can."

'I pity the poor schlub whose job it is to make that call.'

It's time to treat your dog to Le Bon Chien.

"You might consider eliminating some of the roadkill from your diet."

"This is our new product consultant."