Canine Evangelist Pillows

"We'd like to share a message about Dog."

'Cheryl, you are getting way too wrapped up in the dog.'

"Okay, who's purring?"

'The dog doesn't like fishing so I'm taking the cat.'

Good Dog!

"Is your dog friendly?!"

'Are you serious? I've got a good mind to report you to the grievance commitee'

'You know Solomon, I just keep feeling that something isn't quite right today.'

"Your test results are in. You've got Irritable Growl Syndrome."

"Hey. That's my Roscoe. I always thought he liked that game."

'And this bone, would you say he wanted to pick it for quite some time?'

"Well, when you were called a 'bad dog,' were you publicly harmed?"

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

"Let's talk about my Right of Publicity after this photo."

'In conclusion, it's more blessed to give than retrieve.'

"He wants the cat for his next trick. I'd be real careful about this, Eileen."

"I-800-DOGYLAW"

Carrot Throwing Act

"If the next one is any louder than that, I'm out of here."

"Aw, so cute - scooter's running in his sleep again."

"Enough with the drama."

"I'm getting out of the dog walking business! Last night I chased a cat up a tree!"

"Now look! You've upset him!"

Man's Best Friend - Man's Worst Friend - Man's Only Friend

"A guard dog?! You think you're a guard dog!

A cat leading a dog leading a man

Ban Low Flow Toilets.

'The book isn't a self-help book, it's telling you that dogs aren't as important as humans.'

'Fetching the paper was a lot easier than Googling it and printing it.'

"Did you or did you not employ a leash to drag your cairn terrier, Jack, away from the corner of Park Avenue and Sixty-fifth Street in spite of his making every effort to clearly indicate to you that he wished to stay where he was?"

"That 'Love thy neighbor' part, does that include cats?"

"Sorry, but nobody around here reads anymore."

Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Why do dogs have to bark all the time? It's arf for arf's sake!

"Don't listen to those pampered puppies at obedience school: there's no shame is being a working dog!"

That's right: Not only are we 'Man's best friend', but a lot of people are allergic to cats...