Canine Conundrum Gifts

"Are you trying to get me nicked."

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

"I think she's figured out what W-A-L-K means."

"I have good news and bad news about your cat, Dr Schrodinger..."

"Doc, can you make my bite worse than my bark? You see there's this cat . . ."

"We keep revisiting this leash thing... Why is it so difficult for him?"

'Sorry. Your accident insurance doesn't cover that kind of incident.'

It' complications galore for Sparky when easy-to-assemble instructions are read upside down.

'If we had a bill of rights that got wronged, would it be right or wrong for a judge to right that wrong?'

'Bugger it, we're out of beer!'

"Look, if it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you, who was doing all the snoring?!"

"I miscounted."

Sun. Rain.

"Bailey! What part of 'never jump on the Stickley' don't you understand?!"

"I'm running late for totally dignified reasons."

"Hmm, great! - no sign of that dog..."

'Sammy's going to take you for a little walk.'

"Hello 911? Yes it is an emergency. It's my ball. It's gone right under the sofa."

Dog fetching smelly slippers.

"Don't pretend it's a pet, you're just too mean to buy an alarm clock!"

"I should've never taught you to shake."

'Honey must not like you! She's never bitten anyone before.'

"I just don't get it. According to my calculations, they spend on average five days out of seven away from home: Where do they go and what do they do?"

"I know I said my dog had no teeth, mister- but that's not my dog!"

'That's $10.00 for Ben's physical, $7.50 for the rabies shot, $22.50 for the pants, $14.95 for the shirt...'

"Have you tried our new Postman flavor?"

'Wait...Sir...It's customary to pay for services when rendered!'

'You just stood there and let them put a bell on you? -- What were you THINKING?'

'This way I keep the law and don't get grossed out.'

'I know I said, 'my dog doesn't bite'...he's not my dog!'

"Please feel free to regift it."

Choices that face a dog.

Don't Get Involved...

'I'm sorry Roland, I'm starving and I'll have to have to eat you...sniff. Roland would have loved those bones.'