Canine Companions Pillows

'I'm not hungry. I ate with Rover.'

"It's as though he understands everything I say"

Beware of dogs breath.

'Now I see why they call it a 'litter'.'

Do you look like your pet ?

'Tired of fetching?'

'If I act selfish, independent and introverted, it's because I'm a cat trapped in a dog's body.'

Spot Remover.

'Here Ben, heel...c'mon boy...it's a long way home, let's go...'

Dog in the park eats a poo, then comes and licks its owner,

'Hey, is this rigged, or what?'

"Good news, you don't have imposter syndrome - you really are a good boy."

"What about commands that violate your moral code?"

"I didn't have much of a life before Corky, so he was a rescue."

"Loyalty is a quality that people have lost, but dogs have kept."

'It's the only trick he knows.'

'If you ask me, Rambo, there's too much traffic these days!'

Man's Best Friend.

They're quite easy to please actually: Wag your tail when you look at them and you're set for life...

'I'm afraid to ask.'

The Life of Riley...

"When you said this was our Forever Home, did you mean we'd be forever home?"

"This makes a nice change from 'Fetch'!"

"Just because he's neutered and declawed doesn't mean he's not dangerous."

"I have to give you credit. You're a pit bull and you're nice on and offline."

'Well, it's very hard for me not to be catty.'

'Do I have to fetch the newspaper? -- Bill Kristol always leaves a bad taste in my mouth!'

'He was a lousy watch dog until we realized he was near sighted.'

Dog In Bed Between Lovers

Bottled Water Co.

"I'm still not sure how it happened. One day, I'm a highly respected drug-sniffing dog, and the next, I'm snorting all the stuff I can get my paws on!"

"Yep, that's a new sign: I've just finished my law-degree..."

Dogs Awaiting the Arrival of Father Christmas

"My mistress loves me alright: I was the ring-bearer at her wedding..."

'Rover isn't any good at catching frisbees. You've heard of stone hands?...he's got a stone mouth.'