Campus Culture Critic Pillows

"Dickie Wilson attacked my values."

"We demand a safe space."

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

The height of fashion in 1796

Mr. Empirical With "Antarctica""Small is hostile. Rage contributes to shift away from literality. I'm off to True Value Hardware for some more self-reference tools."

"Imagine if only 1/2 the companies that claimed to have a great culture actually did."

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

"It lost a little something in translation."

"Say 'eh.'"

All Hail the Matriarchy

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

"Now that was post-modern sex."

Unlikely Couples #136: Jim and Sheryl Crow

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

"Please don't watch this show! There's a viewer trigger warning and a short fuse alert."

T.S. Eliot lacks the courage to eat a peach.

"I'm after the history section."

"How is it in Russia?"

"Some Debussy, Igor."

"Honey, do you think I'm Eurocentric?"

'Michelle's Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms'

'Burke's B-list celebrities.'

"I wanted to deliver a message of hope and tolerance in a complex global society but I decided to update them on the Kardashians instead."

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

"It's all significantly less impressive once you realize these guys had free child care."

When 'cancel culture' becomes commonplace...

'We're wondering whether you'd fit into our corporate culture!'

'In the future, everyone will have fifteen minutes of tenure.'

"Your employees have lost faith in your ability to pretend to care about them."

"This next song is about a trip to Vermont. It's called 'This is the whitest state I've ever seen—wow!'"

"It's an even numbered day. Do we blame the message or the messenger on even numbered days?"

'Psychoanalysis is passé. I suggest we ask for asylum in France.'

"The last doggy bag."

'Classical music, huh?...You mean like Elvis?'

Mr. Frite Head