Campfire Philosopher Pillows

"Kinda makes you feel insignificant and incredibly hot, doesn't it?"

'I hope i did leave the faucet running so the water will put out the fire from the stove I left on.'

"The system's down."

"I don't think there's enough vodka for another week in Canada."

"He says 'fire no rocket science' - whatever that means."

'Heidegger-Hi!'

'Sure, this is great, but don't you think we should be exploring alternative energy sources?'

'I'm sensing a smooth, mellow brightness with hints of chocolate & a touch of citrus. . . you?'

"At first I was homesick....now I'll probably be campsick for awhile!"

"Okay boys, time to maintain a delicate ecological balance between man and beast."

"Ig a skyscraper collapses in the cit and I don't hear it...will we care?"

'They're out there...ranchers, cowboys soda jerks, insurance salesmen...just waiting for our fire to die down.'

Fire Dreams of Microwave.

Bear bends hunter's guns.

"Y'know, back in my day, we didn't sit inside all the time staring at a fire..."

"Let me take you back to a dark time when all you could do with a phone was make phone calls."

"And because of this one, human indiscretion, the man and wife never trusted each other fully again."

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

Support Group for a Good Problem

Desert Island BBQ

A vampire in a canoe.

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

Harsh Mellows.

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

Camping.

"... and the sales call was coming from inside the house!"

Courage. Love.

'One of the first rules, kids, be sure to watch where you step.'

Roasting the Moneybox

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."