Camp Storyteller T-Shirts

"This is what I learned during my summer at TED camp."

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

Support Group for a Good Problem

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

A vampire in a canoe.

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

"... and the sales call was coming from inside the house!"

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

“Hey Everyone! It’s the first day of Fall! Okay, you go first!”

Camping.

'Dad! Dad! Dad!!. . . We lost our signal.'

'I don't remember this canoe being this heavy, do you Tom?'

'One of the first rules, kids, be sure to watch where you step.'

"He just found that 'pillage' rhymes with 'village'."

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

"I was hoping summer camp would be more ... campy."

"...and those are my deepest, most intimate feelings about our friendship."

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'