Caloric Indulgence Enthusiast Pillows

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

Make your resolutions achievable.

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

Woman thinking about luxuries.

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

'McWit, that's not what's meant by carbo loading.'

"Only 35% CACAO? I'll have to eat TWICE as much then!"

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

In Case of Emergency: Dark Chocolate

Fat man on scales.

"Gucci Firenze 1921"

'This high fiber diet is great! I've lost 10 pounds since I started eating my stuffing.'

"My holy grail is low-fat, low-cal, high-taste."

It's not an addiction if you only do it once a year!

"And it was at the moment I realized that the only thing holding me back from culinary excellence was a bucket-load of butter."

'Please take this away from me.'

'I thought I told you to cut down on sugar.'

"I would kill for your metabolism."

"Do you know donuts have fewer calories than you? I guess that would explain your muffin top."

'It says, 'If you want more fiber, eat the package.'

Complex Carbs

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

'Don't worry. His diet's only last a day or two.'

'I know dieting requires a change of lifestyle, Helen, but this is ridiculous!'

'Did anyone save a stomach for dessert?'

'Forget economy! Put us down for every frill you got!'

"What do you have that justifies its calories?"

Bangers and Mash

"Gimme a double burger between two burgers. And hold the lettuce; it only dilutes the experience."

'They opened an ice cream shop by the gym.'