Cafe Workers Pillows

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

'Do you have any catsup?'

Today's special... donuts.

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."

Non-Power Breakfast

Cafe Burns.

"It's a pumpkin spice latte pie latte."

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

National Coffee Day

How About Serving Us For a Change

'Any chance of a ploughman's?'

"We're going to have to think outside the box to boost sales, minion."

Coffee

"I've spent all night diluting our negative reviews on Yelp." "Really?" "Yeah. You know how you can usually tell when a business owner does that?" "They post 'reviews' that don't have even a hint of negativity." "Amateurs. Check out the negatives I include: 'House of Java Cafe. I hate it because it's so perfect, it makes the rest of my day feel inadequate.'"

Tree Cafe; Free Valet Parking

'I'm a purist. I don't take anything in my Vanilla Mocha Dulce Latte.'

Choice hellhole

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

"Why have you doubled the price of oatmeal?"

'Our special of the day is spam sandwiches.'

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

"Boss, remember when you told me to start charging Sadie 'studio fees' for operating her radio show in the cafe?" "Well, I've got good news and bad news." "What's the good?" "She's agreed not to resort to violence." "I see. And the bad news?" "On today's 'Sadie Cohen Radio Show': Evil cafe owners who may or may not poison their customers."

"Come in, minion."

A sign outside a bookstore reads: "Meet the people in the bookstore cafe staring at their laptops 2-4 p.m."