Caf-fiend T-Shirts

'Sorry, but we can't serve you the grande size anymore without a prescription.'

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

"Two vegans, please."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

Emergency Hipster Beard

"I've decided to make myself another cup of coffee!"

Raphnrrf? Raphnrrf? Umpha? Frfee? Maamr? Pick.

"I'm spending more time promoting myself than I am being myself."

'Bring me another coffee would you...'

National Coffee Day

"It's a pumpkin spice latte pie latte."

Ye Old Cafe: No Coffee Today - Sore Arm!

Coffee Menu

"Gimme a triple shot. I can't face another hour of 'Fetch boy!' without some caffeinated fortitude."

'How would you like your toast?'

"I only drink decaf, otherwise I'm awake up to four hours a day."

'I haven't been able to go to sleep in this new bowl.'

Hot food cafe open every day except Christmas Day.

Meanwhile at the Cafe de la Mort...

I am coffee and I need more coffee

'Careful, this used to be hot.'

'Know something? Love IS wonderful!'

Lunch

"You took your time!" "Better latte than never"

Coffee-Rex: Even more irritable than a Tea-Rex.

'Put down the coffee mug. I forget what you look like.'

Waiter thinks drowning man is asking for 5 beers

"Hypochondriac's handbook. A little passion project I'm working on;, or, rather, I would be working on."

"It's fondue night!"

"Obviously, sir, it's a very discerning, vegetarian fly."

"Let's see, now, that's cappuccino, cappuccino, cappuccino, and cappuccino—right?"

"Yoga has helped me appreciate the healing power of donuts."