Cabinet Chaos Conqueror Pillows

"'Physick for the Cure of thy Ague'… When was the last time we cleared out this medicine cabinet?"

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

'Bad luck duck - he's on your side of the bed.'

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

'Ah, the Bermuda Rectangle for files.'

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

'This is my natural habitat.'

"The 'Queer Eye' people came by - but they fled."

"We need to channel his energy into something positive."

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

Woman in need of an extractor fan.

The classic 'large scale corporate raider' eventually, they end up catching themselves!!

"The employees from the two companies are adapting very well to the merger. I wish I could say the same about the computer systems!"

'When did you get a ceiling fan?'

"Yes, tech support? My laptop was really slow, so I shot it – what should I do now?"

"You need to put on some weight if you want to keep your job!"

Tuppermalware

Cook spills food and has to open a can (tin).

"Unfortunately, we lost the notes on this portion of our sales strategy."

'Just for the minutes did anyone manage to catch the chairman's parting words?'

Sick of the 'Fiscal Cliff'? Cartoonists, politicos and pundits need a new metaphor!!

"Is there anyone here who specializes in stress management?"

Potty Training.

"How come we have so many cookery books cluttering up the kitchen?...I mean, you obviously don't read any of them."

I suggest you call technical support.

'I can't find my camouflage jacket.'

"Don't ask questions, Morton, just get this mess out of here."

To-Do List Chaos

"My computer crashed. . . to the ground when I got frustrated and threw it out the window."

InOut.

"Hey, back off pal. I don't make the rules around here!"

"Ms. Sherburn, could you bring me some scissors and another necktie please."