Buyout Enthusiast Pillows

"Anybody want to merge with a steel mill?"

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

'We divested ourselves of a division here, a subsidiary there, a branch here, an affiliate there...there's nothing left!'

"They've agreed to the merger, the sticking point is who is swallowing who?"

"So far it doesn't look like a hostile takeover."

'There he goes, the bravest M&A knight that our kingdom has ever known.'

"Nobody wants to merge with us."

Fred and Nancy believed that their mutual love of a good sale would be enough to overcome 'the species issue'... but they were wrong.

'There's a gentleman out here with $643 million. He would like to discuss a takeover.'

Business Partners' vows

"I always cry at mergers."

'The buildings are merging.'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

'This has been a test. Had this been an actual corporate takeover...'

Man bombarded by sale adverts in the media

Supermarket Merge

After the Nordstrom-Nordstream Merger

Last Chance for Everything.

'How dare you accuse me of sinking this company?'

Teaching evolution in the business schools.

"I can't decide which I'd rather do- make a twenty-billion-dollar bid of turn down a twenty-billion-dollar bid."

'Just sign your approval for the heliport and we can both go about our business.'

Best Sellers; Worst Sellers.

"I am in training for the sales."

"I've been working remote so long I didn't know my company has been bought and sold three times."

'Shove' (at big sale).

'Our only hope is a merger so we can become too big to fail.'

"So many acquisitions lately ... should we be worried?"

'Oh, no! We've inadvertently gobbled up our own parent company.'

'With the longest run on Wall Street in modern times, our next speaker needs no introduction.'

"Dr. Jenkins was too cheap to buy a state-of-the-art EHR system so he bought this at a public library auction instead."

'We'd like to merge two business lunches.'

'When times are tough, it's vital to rally around the old firm, remember our history, all things that make us who we are.'

'I'll have what's left of my people get in touch with what's left of your people to set up a meeting on a merger.'

'Put them there because we can't figure why they're successful!'