Buying Land T-Shirts

"How many acres do I have? What's an acre?"

Farm Shop - "I'd like a place in Wiltshire with about 200 acres."

'D I Y log cabin for sale'

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

Selling lemon latt�

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

'It's 'baa baa' here and 'baa baa' there, until I'm just about nuts.'

'Betty liked the way her house provided lots of private space.'

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

"You called me, boss?" "Yes, I overheard you talking to patrons about all the new planets we’ve found." "I want you to stop doing that." "At least until I’m done buying up as much of that real estate as I can. I don’t need any competitors driving up the prices." "Very bad man." "When the hipsters run out of cities to gentrify here, my properties on Gliese 581c are going to make a killing."

First National Bank. Keep life exciting --- Ask about our variable rate, interest-only mortgages.

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

'Unforeseeable future site of Hainesmore Industries.'

Practical loans vs. devil-may-care loans.

"I'm bored - let's buy a house in the country that has lots of problems."

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

' ... and this is the half bath.'

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

"Since you had so much fun with the Home Equity Loan I gave you, this year's stocking will be filled with a shiny new Notice of Foreclosure."

"Of course you're feeling tired - you're in your sub-prime."

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

Reverse Mortgage.

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

Bank Loans - Thank you, I shall always be in your debt.

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'