Buying A Car Pillows

'Do you have a cordless model'

"It's very nice, Sir... But is it consistent with the voice of our brand?"

'I don't think I have enough green to buy a green vehicle.'

"Ownership gives one a real sense of accomplishment. Or skip the whole accomplishment thingy and just lease."

'All our vehicles come with a 24-hour, round-the-block guarantee.'

'We spend billions annually on styling changes and preposterous advertising, and you've got nerve to care only about fuel economy and reliability?!'

"And for an extra fourteen hundred dollars I'll stop touching your arm."

'In addition to 16 cup-holders it comes equipped with four dedicated yoga mat storage areas.'

'Take her out for a spin, Guaranteed to blow your mind, Or at least your hair,'

"... With a slightly above average mileage..."

'And you thought buying a used car from a taxi company was a good idea!'

'We're looking for something economical, and we don't care what it costs.'

DMV - Enter Here

"We raised the price but lowered the down payment.. so it kind of evens out."

'My car! My car!'

"... Oh, no. That just means we won't charge you for the rust."

"I know it can drive itself. I'd buy it if it could pay for itself."

'But isn't it nice to know you can go 2500 miles per hour in a pinch?'

'The full history includes all the original letters of complaint to the factory.'

"How long will the 'previously owned' smell last?"

"I like everything about the car except it's expression."

'How many reckless ones?'

'I'm thinking even up, with my old car's trade-in value.'

"After looking over your financial application, I'm going to have our youngest sales rep show you your options."

'The optional health package comes with no cigarette lighter.'

'Dependable, basic transportation. Guaranteed to drive the ladies wild, especially low-maintenance ones.'

'I am buying last year's car, today, with next year's money.'

"Sure, I see the strange man hiding in the backseat. Like they say, it's buyer beware."

Honest John Used Cars.

"This one even has a smoking section."

'And this one has a digital readout to tell you 'how-much' the car is depreciating!'

'I suddenly feel car sick. The annual insurance bill has just arrived.'

'This car drives so smooth it feels like we're flying.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

"This car is very economical on gas. Used hardly any getting over here."